Wednesday, June 30, 2004

How kinky are you? I got a score of 555

Tuesday, June 29, 2004

We've had tons of rain this June. It's the 2nd wettest June ever here possible the wettest by the time june is over. Yesterday our zoo in Fort Worth flooded. Today Arlinton amusment part Six Flags Over Texas Flooded. See pics here flood Click the pic of the rollercoaster and the one under it for pics. More rain due here any minute. We are under a flash flood warning until tomorrow night.

My Favorite movies

1. Grease
2. Cold Mountain
3. Coal miners Daughter
4. The secretary
5. little house on the prairie movies
6. lomesome dove
7.story of o
8. Eye wide shut
9.Pearl Harbor
10. Titanic
11. Lolita
12. Boys don't cry

Sunday, June 27, 2004

My birthday week is over. I'm tired of going.All I did was eat and watch movies on vacation. WHEN WE GO OUT TO EAT WE EAT. WHEN WE GO TO THE MOVIES WE GO TO THE MOVIES Friday before last we went to my sister-in-laws for the weekend. We didn't get to swim no time plus it wouldn't have been good on my hair.That night We went out to eat at Don Pablo's. I had the El Madador. It has 2 enchilidillas, 4 flautas, and a taco. I don't eat rice or beans so I replced them with cornbread. SIL and I shared a chocolate cake and ice cream dessert.
Saturday I went to have my hair dyed red.Hereand here are the pics of me with red hair taken that day.It cost my hmm.. er.. 95 bucks. That's the most I ever spent on my looks. I went to an individual. I only has credit card at the time. MY SIL had to pay her then we paid for her and my niece(13 Years old) for the rest of the weekend. Then we went to the mall. I got a new dress shirt for my party. My niece got some clothes too. Then we went to chili's for lunch. I had a hamburgar and fries. Lastly we went to the movies. We went to see Raising Helen. It was good for a family chick flick. I like Kate hudson. I gave it a 6 out of 10. had popcorn and candy.Sunday morning SIL and my niece went to church while hubby and I slept in. Then we went to my party at the Olive Garden. 14 out of 41 invited people came the company was nice. I had my usual to eat. A sampler with chicken strips, fried beef ravolia, and stuffed mushrooms,(usulally i get fried mozzaralla or fried calimari( but hubby didn't get a sampler. For dinner I had a t-bone and lunch portion of seafood alfredo, Wine(Lambrusco) to drink,and a black tie (chocolate cake mousse) dessert. I got several gifts. a t-shirt( american flag), night shirt(aqua with zodic sign,2 candle, potorri, lip gloss, soap, peach bath soap and lotion, a plant, a wal-mart gift certicate, and 2 books( a self help and a photoshop from hubby). We went home and watched 2 mini series Children of the dust and ture women both westerns both got 8 out of 10. very good movies
Monday we stayed home and watch 10.5 a mini series. It got bad review but we liked. I gave it a 7 out 10.
tuesday we went to the doctor. Hubby got his first prostate examime. LOL He's not a virgin there any more. Then went to IHOP(INTERNATIONAL HOUSE OF PANCAKES)to have breakfast. I had the biggest meatlovers omelette with brisk, sauage, bacon, and ham. I also had a chocolate chip pancake, half a stuffed french toast, so regular butter milk pancakes, link sauage, patty sauage, bacon, and chocolate milk. Hubby suddenly had to go to the bathroom because of the stuff the dr. put up his ass. but being in a wheelchair he couldn't go there. he can't transfer himself and I can't in stange places. Although I have been in men bathrooms plenty to help him in with his urinal. He did make it home in time.
Wensday we went downtown to were he works and the movies.We went to starbucks I got a peanut butter cake thing and a carmel itilian soda. Then looked at books for a great photoshop book I order off when I got home. We ate with a friend from work at the cafe. I had chicken nuggets, fries, texas toast, and pudding. We visited several people at work. I lost my new 60 dollar necklace with my sapprire charm on it that match my earrings in my pic above. We went to see Troy (great movie 8 out of 10). Harry potter 3 ( not as good as 1 and 2 we thought but still worth watching 7 out of 10) and Around the world in 80 days. ( it sucked I'm not a Jackie Chan fan but he was the best thing about the movie. The other 2 main characters sucked 3 out of 10.)I had popcorn and hot dog.
Thursday a repeat of Wensday. Went to starbucks had another carmel itilian soda, carmel brownie, and a chocolate chip cookie. Looked at books awhile. Then visited at work awhile when went to UNO's pizza with his boss and good friend. Talking with him gets kinky. I have crush on him and he knows it. He was at my party. I had most of a medium pizza with chaddar cheese, pepperoni, and sauage. It was so good. They gave me a free dessert. I had an oreo cheese cake.
We saw 3 movies. The day after tomorrow(not the best disaster movie. Not convincing enough not enough character devolopement. 5 out of 10.) Shrek 2 ( just as good as the first one 8 out 100) and lastly Stopford wives. ( I like it. Thought prevoking 7 out of 10.) I had a hot dog. After word we stopped back by uno and had a beer.
FridAY We had to get his hankicaped parking placcards renewed. We have to go back cuz we didn't take the old ones. Then we went to the new super wal-mart. Oh first we went to lurby's I had 3 chicken thighs, a muffin, mashed potatoes, macroni, canalope, and chocolate pie. Some of the cool stuff we got at wal-mart was a birthday cake, cream filled donuts, stuff to make chocolate chip cookies, alferdo chicken hot pockets, boxed fried chicken, Caermal kisses, bridge mix, Air wick relaxtion plug -ins.
Yesterday I ate my boxed chicken some cake and donuts. Today hubby ordered me my favorite pizza. An white scilian pizza(garlic butter instead of tomato sauce, breakfast bacon, itlian sauage and chicken. I got a free turtle cheese cake.
See I told you all I did was eat and watch movies. I don't usally eat like this at all but it's my birthday and hubby's vacation. After 4th of july back to my atkins diet.
I still haven't gotten my b-day spanking maybe to night. But now I'm so tired after typing this I'm not sure. LOL. We are going back to my SIL's for July 4th weekend. Friday we'll go see spider-man and eat. Saturday weare going to a christen concert. July 4th we are going to a boy's ranch where the have rides, a pool. famouse people in concert and fireworks. My hand is killing me from typing. Cya

Thursday, June 24, 2004

UGH! Can you tell I've been around a 13 year old. LOL. Any way. I officially turn 34 at 1:04 pm. I'm now a red head( pics on Saturday.). 14 out of 41 people showes for my b-day. No "fun Fun" tp report. Smackavillie didn't show up for the party Sunday and didn't come over Sunday night. The new bi dom had his kid this week so he couldn't make it Tues. All I've been doing is pigging out and watching movies. More details Saturday.

Thursday, June 17, 2004

Well I did....... Yes really.......... I did... LOL Ok It was 50,000np. NP is neopoints. Neopets is a great game site. You can take care of virtural pets,all kinds play games( I know some of you like that marbles game there is one like it called Destuct-o.)There is a lotto, stock market, hangman, card games, luck games, gambling games, wheel of excitement and scratch off lotto tickets.. And you can buy and collect thousands of items. The site was created for college kids. But kids love it as well as adults of all ages. You do have to give an e-mail address but they don't spam you. You should check it out.
A week from today I'll turn 34. Hubby is officially on vacation. He likes to take vacation on or b-days so we can run around. Tomorrow we are leaving to go to hubby's sister's for the weekend. She only lives 20 or 30 minutes away. Saturday I'm going to get my hair dyed red. I've wanted to do this a long time. I tried Christmas before last but it wasn't like I wanted it. My SIL is going go do my make-up Sat. and Sun. I usually only wear blush and eye shadow. She'll do it all.Then I plan to go get a new shirt, tennis shoes and make-up for my party. We'll also go out to eat and swimming in her above ground pool Friday and/or Saturday. Sunday is my b-day party. Again we like to have parties so that we can have all our friends and both families together. We invited about 41 people but about 21 are coming.(Read more below in birthday blues.) We are going to the Olive Garden my fav. Restaurant. Then we'll come home. Maybe Smackavillie will be at the party and will come back for some fun.
Monday we are staying home to recover. Tuesday we are going to the Dr. for check-ups and my pap smear breast examine, blood and urine test. FUN. Then we are going to IHoP(international house of pancakes) For breakfast and TO MEET A POTENTIAL 3PERSON. Hubby loves breakfast and has been wanting to go our for breakfast along time. The guy we are meeting is a Bi Dom. If things go well we may invite him over after. Wednesday and Thursday(my b-day. We are going to the Movies. When we go to the movies we go to the movies. We are gone from 10am to 10 pm. My poor doggy will have to pee so bad when we get home. We see 3 or 4 movies. Go out to eat. When we get there we like to go to starbucks and get coffee for him and a sweet for me. I also will go the book store and look around. I like to see books then order them off There are tons of good movies to see to go both days. Lastly Friday we are going to get his handicapped car placards the go to wal-mart to get a b-day cake. Can you guess what kinda of icing............come on it's obvious...... buttercream of course. I have a buttercream fetish. I'll get so ice ceam and maybe some chocolate chip cookie pre-mixed or brown sugar so I can make my own. needless to say we won't be on our diets this week or until my goodies run out. Then I'm hitting it hard. BTW, I've lost 8 pounds. I'm 200 even. Of course I might gain it all back in the next few weeks. Hubby goes back to work Saturday. So you see I'll be busy the next week so if I don't write you'll know why. I've been cleaning all this week. I'll be ready for some boring routine nothingness when he starts to work.

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

I decided to call Smackavillie and see when he could come over to talk. He said he could tonight after did some stuff. I happen to actually cooked today(I cooked, cleaned the top part of the kitchen good, did a load of laundry, and had company in one day. I'm tired) anyway he came over(sober) I gave him some food since there was plenty. Then we turned off the TV and talked. First I had him read my letter. Then Hubby did most of the talking. Well we worked it all out and everything is worked out. No one got mad and I didn't even cry. We hugged and he left. No spanking or sex. I guess it was best that way. But I did want a spanking LOL. Today problably wouldn't have been good anyway I'm having back pain. I did fantasize that he would though. LOL I'm glad it's all worked out and we can move on and put that night behind us.

Monday, June 14, 2004

My 34 birthday party is this Sunday. Every year hubby and I like to have B-day parties because it's the only time we can get both families and our friends together. This year I made the mistake of picking Father's Day. I never had a father so I didn't think about it. We invited 41 people it's down to 24 people now. Almost everyone coming is his friends and family. I have 2 Aunts, 2 Uncles, and 2 cousins here close. But only an aunt and uncle are coming. The ones that are not coming( parent and 2 grown kids. Are having a family BBQ just them. I invited all 5 of them. One of my cousins is a real bitch. She hasn't had anything to do with my side of the family. I don't know what this family ever did to her to make her hate us. She didn't even come to my wedding. The reason She gave "just because". I just found out yesterday she and her hubby split up. I guess she just got tired of being married. They were together 13 years. Anyway only 2 of my 6 members of my family are coming. The other two were think of not coming but I kinda guilted them into it. I see all my family at most 5 times a years, most the time less than that.
Last night I got jealous because hubby has new friends to go out with. I thought he said he was planning to go every month to the deer lease. I got mad. We only have 2 Saturdays a month to do stuff. I don't want to give that up every month. I don't mind every couple of months. A fight broke out. I realized I hardly have family of my own and all but one(SMACKAVILLiE)was his friend first. Most are men that we sometimes get together as a couple but I won't say I was really "friends" with there wives.I got really depressed and was crying. I called both uncles and told them how I was feeling. The ones that weren't coming still aren't. Hubby and I also discussed if my city would start having bdsm meetings and parties. I always figured he would ALWAYS go with me even though it's not it thing. But Last night he said he would go to some but problably not all. This upset me. We discussed my interesting bdsm and what I need.
We are meeting a potential 3some partner next tues. He is a BI DOM.

Haven't heard from him since Saturday. I dunno. Maybe I'll call him tomorrow. I want to get it settled but my b-day party Sunday.

QUOTE OF THE DAYScientists and physicists believe that thoughts are not just words in
your head; they actually become units of energy that radiate out from
you and affect your environment. Your thoughts largely influence your
physiology, attitudes, actions, and entire experience of life.
Thoughts also attract circumstances that resonate with their own
energies. -- Judith Richardson, M.A.

Saturday, June 12, 2004

Maybe tomorrow. I've got to be strong.Stand my ground. Any playing tomorrow(spanking or sex) is not a good idea but I sure could use my ass whipped. LOL All I can think of is his big hands on my ass. I need to pull it together and be tough.

Smackavillie called again last night as he has everyday since our fight. Once I picked up and twice he left a message,the other times he just hung up. Last night he left a message just like the other. why are you doing this to me, I didn't do anything, I don't know why your mad at me type stuff.
I was giving hubby a shower when he called. I decided it was time to put an end to this one way or the other. It is time to talk. I called him back and asked him over today to talk. I wouldn't talk about it on the phone but he was mad we didn't pick up. He called back several hours later and said he called to say he missed us. I bet he was drunk. I said "ok but I got to go get him(hubby) in bed he's got to get up at 2 am." The phone rang a few hours later but only once. I pick up quick so it wouldn't wake up hubby. But they hung up. Caller id said it was him. He should be over today or tomorrow.
Hubby left at 4 am to go to a deer lease with a friend. He should be home soon. It's just after 3. I hope he gets home before Smackavillie comes. The fight was between the 3 of us and should be discussed with all of us here. I'll keep up posted on what happens.

Thursday, June 10, 2004

Ray Charles Died today at 73. And they did take another angel home. He'll be missed.

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

I'm one of those people who have a new interest every 5 minutes or old interest resurface. Even though I don't work or have kids there is no way on earth I can keep with all of them. Some interest must fall to the wayside. Unfortunately this has happened.


Summertime is movie time for hubby and I. In the fall, winter, and spring we watch our regular TV show. Continuing Dramas and sitcoms( The best way to check one shows on shows and episodes isTVTOME). But in the summers we watch movies.(Last summer we had tons of old tapes with things we tape in the mid-90's to watch.) But this summer it will be only movies. We don't get to see more than about 10 or 15 movies at the theatres so we like to tape of cable. First I check zap2it for movie listing on everyday. You can customize it to just show movies. You can check just the channels you want to see. Lastly you can View it as a text instead of a grid. It has a summary of every movie for 6 hours on one page. When I see a movie I like I search for it on The Internet Movie Database. This is the BEST movie site on the web. You can custom search by, rating, genre, plot, keyword,language, year made, country made,and much more here. You can browse but release date here. They have every movie, TV show, actor, actress, producer ect. Just type it in to the search. For most movies they point you to there trailer. You can customize your own list of movies and categorize them. There are summaries, rating, and review on each movie. Once I decide if I want to see a movie I add it to my list and Copy and paste it to Yahoo! TV. It show If it the movie is on in the next 14 days. If it is then you click on at time you can click on it then click "add to my calendar".It will appear on Yahoo! Calendar Then you can check your calendar everyday to see what you want to tape. Lastly you can also type a favorite actor or actress or director to tv-nowto see if anything they are in or do is on TV in the next several weeks.
So you can guess this takes a long time. I've allready started taping them and will start watch them this week.



I still love Photoshop. There are tons of tutorials on line. Plus I got tons of book for X-mas plus getting a new cool one for my b-day. Ihave not done it since I found blogs in mid April. I want to get back into it.


Starting Over has went into reruns but I haven't seen them. I can't handle all the mail once we start watching movies. I'm going to try to keep up.

Lastly and most sadly, reading blogs might be pushed as side. I've loved reading bdsm blogs but I just keep getting behind. Plus doing bdsm stuff daily can make me sad that I can't find our perfect bi dom third. I will try to keep up with writing my blog I hope you will keep reading it. I'm going to try to read the 5 ones that I know read mine. Nicki, Confused, Aiyanna, Invida, and D`Anerah. As well as the spanking Blog, La fessee and the sex blog as often as I can. Again I'm sorry I just can't handle all my interest. I still want too read them but I want to do other things too.

Still no word since last time.

Saturday, June 05, 2004

Former president Ronald Reagan died today at 93. God Bless Him


Idon't know if I'll answer is calls or if he'll stop by or not. He may never get a chance to read it but It's here if he comes. Smackavilie,
What you did that night really hurt hubby and I. It could have potentially hurt our marriage. I really don't think you did come over to help that day. At one time you did say something about you help if I'd "take care of you.Hubby said "we won't be calling you then" You got your friend to help so you wouldn't have to. You just wanted to come inside and play with me the whole time. Then all you did was try and make me feel guilty for saying you were just coming over for sex when I knew the truth. You swore up and down you didn't and made me feel guilty. Later that night just proved me right. You said I never invited you over just to watch movies anymore. So I did, JUST TO WATCH MOVIES. We made it clear that there wasn't going to be sex that night. Later you said what you always said "we're do all that tonight". Hubby said something like n we're not. I agreed. We ALL got wasted that night mostly me. You got us both in bed and started playing with me. I pushed you away and said no. You knew you wouldn't get ant from me. You wanted some no matter how you got it. So you turned to him. You wanted him to suck you. If he had would you had returned the favor knowing he wasn't very clean???? You took advantage of both us. He didn't want me to have sex with you because that would be what you wanted inreturn for helping instead of helping out of friendship. I didn't. I said no yet you get him to do you. He did what he told me not too. But you knew too. You both hurt me.We both said no sex earlier but you didn't care. I was more mad at him at the time and trust me we had it out and dealt with it. But as he said to me and I already knew your smooth. You know how to slowly maniputlate people in to giving you what you want.
Something else that really tick me off. Was the next morning when I woke up and looked in the refidgerator There was only 2 tacos left and they weren't even mine. The had everything on it mine had only cheese. So you ate my queadilla and one of my tacos and didn't even care to look to see if they were mine or his. He said he only ate on taco so you ate on of our and my quesidilla. I told you to get that you want there. You chose to eat yours as soon as you got back. You had none left to eat. But you didn't care you took advantage and ate what ever the hell you want. You also ate the burrito he had from earlier that day. I felt like you just said screw her I'll eat hers. Remember I got none earlier that day either because your friend ate them all. So I was fucked and ended up with nothing twice.
Then you kept calling and not leaving a message. Once when you did answer you acted like nothing happen and asked why I was cold. You did finally leave a message but It was all "why are you doing this to ME. Yep it's all about you. What about what you did to is??? Hubby feels the same.
I'm the kind of person that wants to be liked for me. Accepted for who I really am. I want to do that with others too. Why can't you just be you and admit sex is what you want. We can deal from there. I can admit that sometimes I do just want sex. I did want to be spanked that day, But I didn't want sex. What I wanted was to know your a true friend that will help when we need it. And will respect our wishes when we say no sex. You always seem to lie to make yourself look good or feel good about many things. I want to accept you for you being your real self. But you have to be your real self with lies and denials.
I want to work things out. I don't want to lose your friendship. I just don't know if it's possible or not


I fixed al the QUIZ from yesterday. Some you couldn't go to. I'm glad I know a little html.

Friday, June 04, 2004


Smackavillie called about once a day everyday until Wensdaybut didn't leave a message until Tuesday. Tuesday he called and left amessage about not picking up the phone and why we're doing this to HIM. It was kinda rude and made it all about him. What about what he did to us? I didn;t pick up and won't until he leaves a nice message a sorry message. Although I kinda expect him to show up this weekend. But I've been wrong before.


Lat night I wrote a poem to hubby and mailed it to his work e-mail. This morning before I went back to bed he hadn't seen it yet. I got up he said nothing. I hinted around but still he said nothing. Finally I asked he hadn't gotten it. I started crying. I just wanted it to be a complete surprise. Plus I have PMS. Oh well he liked it. Here it is.
Just a note to say hi
just a note to say how glad i am to have you
just a note to say how much it mean to know you'll be there for me everyday
just a not to say how much i love the way you make laugh
just a note to say how much those little running jokes mean to me
just a note to say how much I love your touch
just a note to say how much i love your arm around me at night
just a note to say how much I love your spanks
just a note to say how I love to hear you talking to tia like a baby
just a note to say how much I enjoy our time together watching our shows
even if I don't pay much attention
just a note to say how much I appricate you and all you do
Just a note to say how much I love our talks about life and our memories
just a note to say how lucky I am to have a wonderful man like you
especially when I see men out there like Stage and johnathan on SO. Knowing
there are men much worst then them.
just a note to say you mean the world to me
just a note to say you are the most important person in my life
just a note to say you are my best friend
just a note to say you are my life
just a note to say you are my soul mate
just a note to say you are my sunshine
just a note to say you are my everything
Just a note to say how much I care
Just a note to say how much I need you
just a note to say how much I want you
just a note to say how special you are
just a note to say how much I cherish your love
just a note to thank you
just a note to suprise you
just a note to say I Love you with all my heart, my soul, my mind, my brain,
my body my being, my flesh, my everything and all that I am


Bondage Bear
Bondage Bear

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
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Stoner Bear
Stoner Bear

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Nihilist Bear
Nihilist Bear

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
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I'm an irredeemably eejitous, liberal, disgustingly generous, pathetically simple-minded,

dribbling child!

See how compatible you

are with me!

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color="#000000">you are steelblue


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Take the What
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Thursday, June 03, 2004

Since everyone has been doing the 100 facts about me thing I decided to repost mine from the frist couple of days I started blogging. It's at the bottom of this Intro. This will really let you know me. LOL
I turned 33 on June 24, 2003. Born, raised and always lived in Fort Worth, Texas. I've been married 10 years to hubby. We are both disabled (with Cerebral Palsy). I walk pretty well but have a slight speech impediment. He is in a wheelchair. He can eat, write and do most things himself except for walking and transfering. We are trying to have our first child. We do not drive but ride special busing. He works at home for Radio Shack. I stay home to help him if he needs something plus I have jobaphobia. LOL. I have an Associate of Arts degree from a Tarrent County Junior College. We have 3 pets, A 5 lb. Deer Chihuahua name Tia Fawn, a calico Callie Patches, and another cat named Cyber Link. I'm Obsessive Compulse. LOL. Can u tell?.
I've said it in my last jounal, I'm no artist. I can't draw a straight line on paper or the pc. Partically because of my cerebal palsey. However, Been here has inspired me to "play"with photoshop and paint shop. I got new version of both. I couldn't figue out how to download and install gimp.
I think all the brush, filters, styles,and actions you can download is SO COOL. If anyone has any tips for a talentless beginer let me know. I Love tutorials too. I'm always looking for new coloring pages, tutorials, filters, styles, brushes, anf actions.Ok I'm off to play, experiment, and most important have fun which is what it's all about right. I am going to take a photoshop Class Feb 17 th to March 4th. I have several photoshop books now too.
I love exortic fetish, bdsm, nudity, spanking, and Alt lifestyles. If you want to know more send a note.
I love collecting all kinds of pictures including portraits, fantasy, unicorns, Pegasus, chess, checkers, clown, mimes, Alice in Wonderland, jesters, baby animals, faces, erotica, castles, lighthouses, neopets, cat like creatures, dog like creatures, horse like creatures, wizards, crosses, crucifixion, Goth, vampires, Anne Rice, harry potter, Lord of the Rings, Star Trek, Star Wars, elves, eyes, rainbows, mazes, Lisa Frank, angels, ferrets, zebras, tattoos, wonderland, beds, Religious, devils, Dream imagery, Alien life forms, Fairies, Landscape, nature, Magic and Sorcery, spells, Mythical Creatures & assorted Monsters, Photo-/model based compositions, or photo realism, Romance, Emotion, Love, Centaurs, colorful picas, graffiti, hot air balloons, Indians, kites, medieval paintings, mosaics, masks, mermaids, renaissance art, snow scenes, soap operas, teddy bears, unicorns, Victorian art, volcanoes, witches, wizards, wolves and more
My 100+ facts
Everyone is doing this now. I love using eveyone else and checking what applys to me. But I decided to do my own. Please feel free to use mine. Also send me any if I don't have it in my about me entry.Only read if your open minded and mature. Only read if you want to know the REAL me.
Stuff Deviant art should add to Devious Information...

Favorite television show: Full House, Little house on the Prairie, General hospital, All My Children, Port Charles, American Dreams, ER, Third Watch, Smallville. AHHHHHHHH too many to list
Favorite Actor: John Stamos, Michael Landon
Favorite Actress: Finola Hughes Melissa Gilbert.
Favorite colors: Dark blue and Bright yellow together, Dark colors, rainbows
Favorite Clothes: Causal, Denim, Shorts, Sweats or nothing
Favorite hobby: Collecting Stickers (I have 13 photo Albums full and have been collecting since 1981.)Collecting pics
Favorite Foods: Pizza, Fried Chicken, Pasta, ice Cream, Butter Cream icing
Favorite Flowers: Yellow Rose, Orange tiger lily with black Spots.
Favorite number: 11
Idea for Deviant artist: I have this picture in my head of 4 clowns looking down at the camera or viewer. Surrounding it in a circle. I mean looking from four corners. I wish some could paint it or take it for me
From *frail: (changed some)

if I were a _____________
Date: November 11th 1111
day of the week : Thursday or Saturday
time of day : 11:11 AM
planet : Saturn
direction : South
liquid : Diet Dr. Pepper
stone : rare one
tree : weeping willow
bird : colorful parrot
tool : hammer
plant : fern
kind of weather : Snow
historical figure : Laura Ingalls Wilder
mythical creature : Unicorn
animal : some sort of Wild cat,
sea animal : Dolphin
color : Royal blue or bigt yellow
emotion or mood : Pleasure
musical instrument : piano
sound : children playing but not too loud
element : fire
car : A blue sports car with a yellow lighting bolt
song : "Butterfly kisses"
sin : Lust
movie directed by: Steven Speilberg
comic strip character : Betty Boop
piece of furniture : a featherbed
vegetable : broccoli
food : butter cream icing
place : Disney land
material : denim
taste : butter cream icing
scent : vanilla
religion : Christianity
word : fun
object : computer
body part : here use your imagination
facial expression : smile
subject in school : Art
cartoon character : Betty Boop
shape : heart
number : eleven
My 100+ facts
Insturctions copy and paste into your jounal. put *OR BOLD
the one that apply to you or delete the ones that don't.
1. My mother commited sucide when I was 20 she was 40.
2. My best friend Died of a heart attact at 20. She had 3 kids the youngest was 1 week.
3. I have cerebal palsey.
4. I have socialphobia
5. I am obsessive compulsive.
6. I've only had one job in my life and it was part time.It was in a church nursey and the got rid of me cuz I was disabiled.
7. I love to be spanked
8. I like pain if I recieve it willingly.
9. I like Kinda an Alternative lifestyle.
10 I'm a nudist.(kinda)
11. I'm agaist censorship.
12 I'm somewhat religous. Jesus is my saviorbut I don't go to church. Church people can be the biggest hypicrits.
13 my favorite pizza is not with tomato sauce but with garlic butter, chicken, itilian sauage, pepperonii, breakfast bacon and tons of cheddar chesse.
14. I'm very shy, introvertive, but talkive.
15. I have lots of books but never read.
16. I'm extremly sentive, get my feeling hurt real easy and cry very easy.
17. I used to be a shoplifter not now thank god.
18. My 5 lbs chihuahua is my pride and joy.
19. I kinda hate my cats. mostly one of them
20. I occasionly smoke pot. maybe one every to or 3 months.
21. I love to drink.
22. I'm trying to get pregant. don't worry I'm not doing 20 and 21 when trying.
23. I hate to go to School. I never went. Once I messed 56 day in a year.
24. I never knew my dad.
25. I like porn.
26 My hubby is in a wheelchair and can't walk.
27. I'm afraid of getting a job.
28. In graduated junior college where I majored in psycology minored in religon and socialogy.
29. I made bad grade(vc's d's f's) in school until I quit and went back then I mostly got A's and B's
30 I weight about 200lbs and am about 5'2.
31 I hate myself sometimes
32 I desprately want to be accepted as I turely am.
33. I'm a terrible liarer and rarely lie.
34. growing up I wanted to be a teacher now if I were to get a job it would be with kids of computers.
35/ I feel like a terrible person sometimes.
36. Over all I think I'm a good persons
37. Besides pot and prescription drugs I've only done drugs once.
38. I have many issues and problems.
39. I like people to know everything about me.
40. I think my mom was abad mom even though she didn't abuse me, drink, do drugs, party, or have guts around.
41. I idolize my grandpa.
42 I'm an only child.
43.I'm addicted to soap operas.
44.i'm addicted to diet dr. pepper.
45. I'm lazy.
46.I've lived here almost 3 years and still haven't finshed packing.
47. I have no pics on my wall
48 I hate cooking.
49.I love sleeping and dreaming.
50.Little house on the prairie is my favorite show. I fantatize i'm laura and I've been bad.
51.I have a brown thumb.
52 I don't bathe as much as most people cuz I don't go anywhere or see any one but hubby often.
53. my IQ is 110.
54. I feel stupid for telling you all this
55. I'm a child at heart and love childlike stuff.
56. i collect Stickers.
57.I love kids.
58. I have an inferiority complex
59. I'm obsessive Compulsive.
60. I love food that is bad for you.
61. I hate food good for you.
62. I have no friends of my own right now they were all hubby's friend first.
63.i love learning.
64. i hate exercise.
65. I have a speech problem.
66. I walk funny.
67. I have always had a good skin complexion.
68. I'm a causal dresser. I don't care about fashion.
69. My computer is in the living room. I always work on the pc and watch tv at the same time. I live in this chair.
70. I care too much about what people think.
71. I hate chatting on line but should more to make friend.
72. I'm looking for a DOM.
73. I'm addicted to techtv's call for help and screensavers.
74.I'm a bbw. I do think I'm pretty despite my weight and disability.
75.I love thril rides.
76. I love thinking games but hate games where you just walk around a board.
77.I'm sorta bi.
78.i've done M/F/M
79.If I could do anything I'd dance and do gymnastics.
80.I'm insecure
81.I'm an only child.
82. I'm a night owl
83.I love rpgs but hardly play them.
84.I love creamy foods.
85. I love Tv and movies.
86. I hate coffee.
87. I love creamy foods.
89.'m not a good housekeeper.
90.'m taking a photoshop class soon.
91. I only cuss at home with hubby.
92.Chicken, pizza, steak, pasta, cheese, ice cream, and chicoalate candy, cake with buttercream icingare my fav foods.
93.I love sims game.
94. my brain never stops working. I wish it would shut up.
95.I've only been out of texas twice.
96. I love collecting pics on my screenpaver screensaver.
97.I appectiate a nice body male or female.
98. I've never been with a girl.
99.I hate snobs and arrogant people most.
100. I'm very open minded.
101. I hate judgemental people
102. I'm terrible with spelling grammer and typing.
103 I was a very good kid. I never hardily got in any trouble except for not going to school and not doing my chorus.
104. I;m a spoiled brat.
105. I have hernated disk in my lower back and neck
106.My fav resturants are Olive Garden, Red Lobster,China Jade, and Bamboo garden drink of choice is beer but I like wine, pina coladas with tequilla, and coke or egg nogg with rum , tequilla, or crown royal.
108.I sometimes take too much prescription drugs and/or over the counter drugs to sleep or feel good.
109.Growing up I had an imaganary friend named Duh..... This was before the expression Duh started.
110.When a memory plays in my head I don't want to deal with comes to my mind I say stupid things to my self like " i wish this day was over", "I wish everyone would leave me alone( mostly the time I'm alone when this happens)", " Ihate my life" , and even sometimes "I wish I was dead"
111. I like weenie and cheese cooked in the microwave.
112.I used to cook sliced cheese in the oven by it self.
113. I like frying roast and brisk in a skillet.
114.I like cooked honeycombs cereal.
115.Neither hubby nor I can drive. favorite perfume is White diamonds. I also like vanilla and lavander sense
117. Hubby and I met on our transfertation disabled bus system
Other peoples 100 facts
1. I hold my breath often without thinking about it.
2. I'm making a book of only nursery rhymes.
3. I love dinosaurs.
*4. I have a terrible time making friends.
I have a hard time trusting people.
*I feel like most people can't/wont understand me.
I just don't think most people are interesting.
5. I love kung fu movies- good and bad.
6. I belong to 2 political action committees:
Straight Talk America PAC (John McCain's group)
JAM PAC (against censorship)
7. I have a subscription to Marie Claire.
8. I talked to Anne Rice for about 30-40 minutes once. I've spoken with Harrison Ford before too.. but very briefly.
9. I desperately want to travel around the world.
*10. I can't bring myself to get rid of any books that I own.
11. I have a younger brother who's 18 yrs. old named Tim.
*12. I eat with my hands whenever possible.
*13. I cry very easily.
*14. I love drawing with big Crayola markers.
*15. I've lived my entire life in the Dallas metroplex.

100 Things about me:
1. Copy this whole list into your journal.
2. PUT A star by the things that are true about you.
3. Whatever you don't Star are false
(I couldn't figure out how to bold so I changes it to put a star by.

*01. When I was younger I made some bad decisions
02. I don't watch much TV these days
*03. I love psychadelic mushrooms
*04. I love sleeping
*05. I have loads of books
*06. I once slept in a toilet
*07. I love playing video games
*08. I like marijuana
*09. I watch porn movies
10. I watch them with my father
11. I like sharks
12. I love spiders, I think they're adorable, especially the ones with bright colours on their backs
13. I was born without hair and I still have no hair
14. I like G. Bush
*15. People are cool.
16. I have changed a lot mentally over the last year
*17. I have a lot to learn
19. I carry my knife everywhere with myself
20. I'm really really smart
*21. I've never broken someone's bones
*22. I have a secret
23. I hate snow
24. I drink only milk
25. I drink too much water
26. I hate microsoft
*27. I love Chinese food
*28. I would hate to be famous
*29. I am not a morning person
*30. I wear glasses
31. I don't need glasses, except sunglasses
32. I have potential
33. I'm pure Japanese
*34. My legs are two different sizes
35. I have a twin
36. I'm wearing a padded bra
*37. I can ramble on about absolutely nothing
38. I'm left-handed
39. I hate llamas, but I'm one of them
40. I don't like horror movies
41. I suck at climbing, but I love it anyway
42. People hate me usually. eh, probly
43. I love pop music
*44. I hardly ever go to bed before midnight
*45. I hate parking fines
46. I know national anthem of my country by heart
47. I know more than two languages not good at them but
*48. I spend too much time on the computer
49. I often want to throw out the computer in a window
*50. I live on a ground floor ... sort of...
51. I don't like chocolate
*52. I'd like to be more original
*53. I've lied
54. Cocks are my favorite birds
55. I want to conquer the world
*56. I wonder what happens when you die
57. I've read all books about Harry Potter
58. Eat your dog!
59. I love to exercise. only if I get time
60. I hate chemistry with a passion
61. I love to write
62. I like changes
63. I hate going to class
64. I am afraid to die
*65. I hate dish washing
*66. My hair is long, brown, and incredibly curly
67. My nails are nine inch long
68. My favorite color is black
69. I like to sleep on the floor
70. I am hopeless at cooking
71. I sucked my thumb when I was little.
*72. I should be doing somehting else rather than writing this
*73. I am online a lot, but not in MSN
*74. I hate government
75. I don't have a girlfriend/boyfriend
76. I'm too nice for my own good.
77. I love to read, I read as much as I can.
78. I don't trust newspapers
79. I like debating
80. I live in a vagon
81. I clean my room once a month
82. I'm scared of american fast food
83. I have a third eye
84. I love Mozambique
85. I don't trust any religion.
86. I used to play with barbies because all the other girls were doing it
87. I wanted to be a super hero when I was little.
88. I like listening to wind chimes sometimes... others I want to kill them
*89. I'm very disorganized
90. My hair is long and straight
91. I earn a lot
92. I don't like spicy food
93. I keep a diary
*94. I can't do cartwheels
*95. I am very lazy sometimes.....
*96. I'm sarcastic
97. I think my hair is annoying
*98. I'm very sensitive
*99. I love being "ab-normal"
100. My left eye is violet and my right eye is a light blue.

Wednesday, June 02, 2004


I know you all don't watch it but can you guys go sign my petition so I can see the final episode of my favorite show Starting Over. Here's the address.

TV Show of the Day

Starting Over.

Starting Over is the best show on TV i think. It a reality show where women of all walk of life go to Start there life over. It's on NBC weekdays Usully about noon, but so people see it about 1 a.m. Six women at a time live in the house. There are 2 life coaches. Right now the is one pregnent girl trying to decide rather or not to give up her baby. She was homeless before she moved on the house. She's due any day.

Another woman if trying to find her father she's never met. She's also dealing with her mothers death which may.....MAY turn out to be suicide.

There is a mother and daughter team trying to fix a terrible relationsship.
A woman trying to get of welfare and another trying to start a career.

I's helpful to see them complete assignments given by the coaches. It's my favorite show. You can find more here
Starting Over

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